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charloweenSo. Spiderman III. It's no Batman Forever, but...
Good points:
1. JAMES FRANCO. Evil James Franco makes me giddy. Giddy James Franco melts my cynical soul. He is also very pretty. This is not a bad thing. This is a very, very good thing.
2. All of the supporting cast. Topher Grace? Fabulous. Ted Raimi? Divine. Bruce Campbell? Magnifique. Landlord dude and his daughter? Hilarious. The only time the audience was responsive to the film was when it was a scene with one of the supporting characters. The scene with J. Jonah Jameson and his secretary got the biggest laughs. Everything with Pete and M.J.? Lame.
3. VENOM WAS SO COOL. SANDMAN WAS ALSO COOL, but less bitey and snarly. Topher Grace made such a good kooky-then-freaky villain.
4. You don't actually need to have seen the other movies, because this one recaps and flashes back to the other two enough that you GET IT ALREADY.
5. Emo Peter Parker? Disturbingly attractive in a Fall Out Boy kinda way. I say this is good because pretty is good.
6. The scene with Harry and M.J. dancing in the kitchen. James♥! Franco♥!
7. Obvious CG, but well-executed CG.
8. Random Willem Defoe cameo. ♥ Willem Defoe.
9. There was a table of Spidey merchandise, and on the table was the singing/dancing Spidey doll that Krissy has. Tee-hee.
10. Did I mention James Franco? Every single scene with him was watchable. The scene in the hospital, did you notice he played it slightly loopy... as if on pain meds? Great acting there. Both Harry and Peter go through giddy highs and evil revengey I KILL PEOPLE OMG lows, and both actors get to play a huge range. James Franco does it better than the other guy. Just saying. He's just more credible. I remember reading a review that came out back with the first Spidey film that said James Franco as Harry Osborne did with that character all that Hayden Christensen tried and failed to do with Anakin in Attack of the Clones. Given even a half-assed script (and, I'm sure, inspired direction), James Franco just brings it.
11. Going to see a film like this with a group of geeky-as-all-hell friends makes it enjoyable, despite its fatal flaws (see below).
Bad points:
1. Nearly everything is a WTF moment. Almost tipping it over into the coveted "So Bad It's Good" category. Almost. Mostly it's just bad. Oh so bad. Embarrassing to watch bad. Avert your eyes to not see the bad, kind of bad.
2. Sam Raimi grabbed his huge budget, took his shambles of a nonsensical screenplay, gathered his cast, and shot whatever the fuck he wanted and then stitched it together into a movie. This would be good if any of it had any kind of cohesion.
3. Stan Lee's cameo. Holy Flying Jesus Murphy, what the hell was that?
4. THERE IS NO NEED TO HAVE SPIDERMAN POSE IN FRONT OF AN AMERICAN FLAG. IN EVERY MOVIE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THAT IS HOLY, STOP.
5. The fact I felt the need to keep muttering "lame" under my breath at the movie. After nearly every scene. During nearly every scene. Except for the bits with Venom. And whenever Harry and Peter were sharing smoldering glances and feeling angst over their forbidden, passionate man-love.
6. Creepy not-Alfred butlerton man. *shudders*
7. The fact the film feels like a patchwork quilt of other films. Romantic comedy here,
8. FORGIVENESS IS GOOD okay I get it FORGIVENESS IS GOOD yes thanks I caught that the first ti-- FORGIVENESS IS GOOD ...*weeps*
9. The fact that Peter Parker spends most of the film almost-nearly crying (in close-up, no less) or emo-moping. Sigh. Dear Peter, you are not (not!) Harry Potter. The trailer for Order of the Phoenix - the trailer alone - looks about twenty-three times better than Spiderman III. Sorry, you lose. Peter Parker? More like Peter Potter.
10. HARRY'S DEAD FROM FALLING LOTS no he's alive HARRY'S DEAD FROM EXPLOSION no he's alive HARRY'S DEAD FROM STABBY well, they bury someone so I guess he might stay dead this time.
11. Everyone left the theatre quickly and silently.
12. There were more than a few scenes that might have been played for humour, but no one laughed. Who knows?
13. Baffling pacing problems. How many alternate cuts of this film exist? Why didn't we get to see one of them?
14. Bill Cosby made exactly zero appearances in the film.
So did I like it? Parts of it. There were parts that were glorious. Then there was the rest of the film. The most criminal thing about a movie like this is that the flashes of brilliance were frequent enough and sparkling enough that I know the rest of the movie could have been so much better. Now, I find Spiderman as a character cringingly tedious, and the Spiderman films are pretty darned painful to watch (except for the parts with James Franco). I'll admit to that bias, no problem. That's not to say there weren't parts of this film I quite enjoyed. There were many parts that were excellent, but they didn't flow with the rest of the film, nor was the rest of the film up to the level of the excellent supporting characters and cameos. I won't rush out to see it again. Of the $12 that it cost to get into the theatre, a good $9 of that was excusable because of James Franco.
Enough of that.
For the past few days at work I've been doing pretty serious graphic design stuff. If James Franco isn't available, I'd consider marrying Adobe's In Design software. It's a beautiful piece of programming and made these projects not only possible but also easy. Easier than fighting with Illustrator or Quark, anyway.
And today after work I got to meet![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
squonk in person! We'd decided that knowing each other through lj and living in the same city (practically the same neighbourhood, no less) and not at least having a tea together was just silly. We had a good long chat and I was nearly late for Spiderman III. (Also? this is the vid I was telling you about!)
...now it's nearly 1am (just how long was that movie, anyway?) and I can barely keep my eyes open. *waves at everyone* Bed bed bed. It's been a long week full of lots of wonderful things (and a few strange things, too). Bed bed bed. Maybe tomorrow I'll sleep in until 9am. Mmm... the freedom of the weekend. AND TOMORROW WE'RE SEEING WAITRESS!
Good points:
1. JAMES FRANCO. Evil James Franco makes me giddy. Giddy James Franco melts my cynical soul. He is also very pretty. This is not a bad thing. This is a very, very good thing.
2. All of the supporting cast. Topher Grace? Fabulous. Ted Raimi? Divine. Bruce Campbell? Magnifique. Landlord dude and his daughter? Hilarious. The only time the audience was responsive to the film was when it was a scene with one of the supporting characters. The scene with J. Jonah Jameson and his secretary got the biggest laughs. Everything with Pete and M.J.? Lame.
3. VENOM WAS SO COOL. SANDMAN WAS ALSO COOL, but less bitey and snarly. Topher Grace made such a good kooky-then-freaky villain.
4. You don't actually need to have seen the other movies, because this one recaps and flashes back to the other two enough that you GET IT ALREADY.
5. Emo Peter Parker? Disturbingly attractive in a Fall Out Boy kinda way. I say this is good because pretty is good.
6. The scene with Harry and M.J. dancing in the kitchen. James♥! Franco♥!
7. Obvious CG, but well-executed CG.
8. Random Willem Defoe cameo. ♥ Willem Defoe.
9. There was a table of Spidey merchandise, and on the table was the singing/dancing Spidey doll that Krissy has. Tee-hee.
10. Did I mention James Franco? Every single scene with him was watchable. The scene in the hospital, did you notice he played it slightly loopy... as if on pain meds? Great acting there. Both Harry and Peter go through giddy highs and evil revengey I KILL PEOPLE OMG lows, and both actors get to play a huge range. James Franco does it better than the other guy. Just saying. He's just more credible. I remember reading a review that came out back with the first Spidey film that said James Franco as Harry Osborne did with that character all that Hayden Christensen tried and failed to do with Anakin in Attack of the Clones. Given even a half-assed script (and, I'm sure, inspired direction), James Franco just brings it.
11. Going to see a film like this with a group of geeky-as-all-hell friends makes it enjoyable, despite its fatal flaws (see below).
Bad points:
1. Nearly everything is a WTF moment. Almost tipping it over into the coveted "So Bad It's Good" category. Almost. Mostly it's just bad. Oh so bad. Embarrassing to watch bad. Avert your eyes to not see the bad, kind of bad.
2. Sam Raimi grabbed his huge budget, took his shambles of a nonsensical screenplay, gathered his cast, and shot whatever the fuck he wanted and then stitched it together into a movie. This would be good if any of it had any kind of cohesion.
3. Stan Lee's cameo. Holy Flying Jesus Murphy, what the hell was that?
4. THERE IS NO NEED TO HAVE SPIDERMAN POSE IN FRONT OF AN AMERICAN FLAG. IN EVERY MOVIE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD AND ALL THAT IS HOLY, STOP.
5. The fact I felt the need to keep muttering "lame" under my breath at the movie. After nearly every scene. During nearly every scene. Except for the bits with Venom. And whenever Harry and Peter were sharing smoldering glances and feeling angst over their forbidden, passionate man-love.
6. Creepy not-Alfred butlerton man. *shudders*
7. The fact the film feels like a patchwork quilt of other films. Romantic comedy here,
8. FORGIVENESS IS GOOD okay I get it FORGIVENESS IS GOOD yes thanks I caught that the first ti-- FORGIVENESS IS GOOD ...*weeps*
9. The fact that Peter Parker spends most of the film almost-nearly crying (in close-up, no less) or emo-moping. Sigh. Dear Peter, you are not (not!) Harry Potter. The trailer for Order of the Phoenix - the trailer alone - looks about twenty-three times better than Spiderman III. Sorry, you lose. Peter Parker? More like Peter Potter.
10. HARRY'S DEAD FROM FALLING LOTS no he's alive HARRY'S DEAD FROM EXPLOSION no he's alive HARRY'S DEAD FROM STABBY well, they bury someone so I guess he might stay dead this time.
11. Everyone left the theatre quickly and silently.
12. There were more than a few scenes that might have been played for humour, but no one laughed. Who knows?
13. Baffling pacing problems. How many alternate cuts of this film exist? Why didn't we get to see one of them?
14. Bill Cosby made exactly zero appearances in the film.
So did I like it? Parts of it. There were parts that were glorious. Then there was the rest of the film. The most criminal thing about a movie like this is that the flashes of brilliance were frequent enough and sparkling enough that I know the rest of the movie could have been so much better. Now, I find Spiderman as a character cringingly tedious, and the Spiderman films are pretty darned painful to watch (except for the parts with James Franco). I'll admit to that bias, no problem. That's not to say there weren't parts of this film I quite enjoyed. There were many parts that were excellent, but they didn't flow with the rest of the film, nor was the rest of the film up to the level of the excellent supporting characters and cameos. I won't rush out to see it again. Of the $12 that it cost to get into the theatre, a good $9 of that was excusable because of James Franco.
Enough of that.
For the past few days at work I've been doing pretty serious graphic design stuff. If James Franco isn't available, I'd consider marrying Adobe's In Design software. It's a beautiful piece of programming and made these projects not only possible but also easy. Easier than fighting with Illustrator or Quark, anyway.
And today after work I got to meet
squonk in person! We'd decided that knowing each other through lj and living in the same city (practically the same neighbourhood, no less) and not at least having a tea together was just silly. We had a good long chat and I was nearly late for Spiderman III. (Also? this is the vid I was telling you about!)...now it's nearly 1am (just how long was that movie, anyway?) and I can barely keep my eyes open. *waves at everyone* Bed bed bed. It's been a long week full of lots of wonderful things (and a few strange things, too). Bed bed bed. Maybe tomorrow I'll sleep in until 9am. Mmm... the freedom of the weekend. AND TOMORROW WE'RE SEEING WAITRESS!
